Thanksgiving is my FAVORITE time of the year…
A couple days before Thanksgiving I wrote about being overwhelmed by Thanksgiving. I am not exactly sure why I was feeling so overwhelmed but it all came to a head the day before my kids Thanksgiving break ended… after everything was winding down.
Thanksgiving dinner went off without a hitch. We had so many leftovers it has been glorious. I honestly have no complaints. Let’s put it this way, I am just now having to cook for my family and it’s not because we don’t have any turkey left. I actually just googled how long turkey is good for in the refrigerator. In case you were wondering according to google it’s 3-4 days. Oops today marks day 7.
I really enjoyed playing games with the family. I think my favorite was definitely Bears Vs. Babies and it’s totally kid friendly! It’s this game right here. I also really enjoyed watching my children learn how to play chess. Who knew how fast these little kids would pick up chess? It’s insane to me.
My biggest gripe was how fast the time came and went. Our time together as a family was wonderful. It never feels quite long enough. Early Sunday morning my sister and her family left for their 7+ hour ride back to their home (she has 2 babies, 2 and under… makes for a LONG trip) in North Carolina. My parents left shortly after my sister for their trek back to their home in New York.
The house was quiet as we all hurried to tidy up before heading out to Costco for groceries. Christmas music quietly filled the room as I began making our grocery list for the week.
Bri was nuking leftovers for the kids and then it happened… Out of no where the tears completely flooded me. I snuck upstairs to be alone for a moment to sort out my emotions. No sooner I shut my bedroom door and crashed on my bed a little knock was at my door… it was my daughter, “Mommy what’s wrong?”
…I couldn’t explain to her why I was in tears?
My Lyssie and I just laid on my bed in quiet as the tears kept streaming down my face. The truth is I’m really not sure why I was such a mess… in that moment the tears were so unexpected yet oddly soothing. I was ok in my quiet brokenness.
The night before I had gone out with my mother and sister to buy yet another set of Christmas lights. We had spoiled my mother whose birthday just passed and enjoyed a hot cup of Starbucks Peppermint Mocha. As we turned in to my neighborhood I turned up the Christmas music. When we rounded the corner just before my house I saw our new neighbor outside putting Christmas lights up… I burst in to a puddle of tears.
My dad saw my face and he didn’t know what to do with me as I pulled in to my driveway. See the old man across the stress is the “replacement” old man that has -always- lived across the street. Last year he lost his fight to cancer leaving behind his wife. She has since sold their house and moved away. The new neighbor is bizarrely old, maybe a little younger than our neighbor that died. He has grey hair, drives a truck VERY similar to our deceased neighbor and is a military vet…
I’ve been a bit un-expectantly emotional lately. I haven’t really been able to talk to my husband about it because I haven’t been able to put to words what’s been going on in my heart. That moment with my Lyssie upstairs, was like my heart was broken in to a million tiny pieces… I cried for Jenn a family member of mine that had passed earlier in the year. Her husband and boys have been left behind to navigate through life without her. That’s not fair! I cried for my Aunt who has lost both her boys to tragedy in years past. Again, that’s not fair! I cried for my MIL that lost her father unexpectedly it just doesn’t seem fair! I could go on and on.
Life sometimes just isn’t fair… Here I am thanking God for all that I have, the people in my life and the ability express gratitude by feasting at Thanksgiving. I got so wrapped up in my life that I never even picked up the phone to call my loved ones and let them know that I was thinking of them.
This time of the year is always so special to me. I’m still sorting through my emotions that seem to be all over the place right now. Life isn’t always fair. Life is definitely hard. This season I’m choosing to slow down and truly be thankful for all that God’s given me.